February 28, 2007

untitled

For A_____

i don’t know what it’s like
to walk on the streets unarmored
to be gouged all over
by the bayonets of stares
to march under blitzkriege
spat from lips in stealthy hisses
      and plosive mutters
(lesbian!) (butch!)
i wonder how you’d walked thus far
with a back so straight
and a head held high
when every step is a step
on a minefield of ignorance and bigotry
even if i can’t see your wounds and scars
you can’t be unscathed
and when you vow to be rich and powerful
so they won’t just see a lesbian
they’ll see a successful and authoritative person
but who is still only human
still only human
even though i don’t see them in your eyes
i can hear the tears in your voice
you are already more powerful
than you think you are

February 14, 2007

valentine

to wake / up in the early hours / morning / still swathed in night / disintegrating vestiges / of dreams / already forgotten / fan whirling above / skin on bedclothes / on the right side / of bed / alone / oh so alone

February 12, 2007

stealing

it is pilferage
the way we kiss
when their backs are turned

theft
the way we pick loose change
from Time’s pocket
(always seconds and minutes
  never hours)
to spend fucking
in toilet stalls

and it is criminal
to not be able to be who we are
love who we love
honestly

February 09, 2007

cornucopia

i imagine you are the cornucopia
orchard of forbidden fruits
Nile of milk and honey

your lips tongue throat
red sweet and wet
quench thirst
your breasts nipples belly
full heavy and ripe
sate hunger

the endless sweet stream
from the delta
of your thighs
founds and sustains
civilizations

you are
the most delectable path
to wisdom

private paradise
i will not share
with anyone



(Edited 10th February 2007)

sometimes i want

sometimes i want so desperately
i want so hard so much
i can hardly breathe

as if
what i want

is
air

February 08, 2007

untitled

on the upper-deck of the bus
right in the front
by the windscreen
i can see almost everything

such as for example
myself
trundling headlong
into the busy traffic
of life

involuntarily

February 07, 2007

traffic jam

tiny red sports car
large gray truck: does not matter
in a traffic jam

February 05, 2007

i would rather

i would rather see you
      when i look at nothing

than to see nothing
      when i look at you

untitled

on television
in a matter of seconds with quick
swipes of his hands
the Chinese face-changing master
changes innumerable painted faces
i wait for him to finally show
his true face
                           he never does

in front of the mirror
slowly painstakingly with downward
strokes of a cotton-pad
i wipe my unmade-up face
waiting to uncover a face
i would recognize as my own



4th - 5th February 2007

February 04, 2007

feast

i think sometimes i hurt so bad inside
because i want you so badly to devour me
bread fruit and honey
want to offer you in the cracked chalice
of my skull the honeycomb of my brain and
spread the honey thick on my sweetbreads
present on the half-broken plate of my breast
(or have your fingers plunged deep into my chest for)
the ripe plump fruit of my beating heart
let me inflame your appetite
let me watch you savor every bite
lick clean the rivulets of bloody juices
running down your chin
feed on me
drink from me
you will live forever
to taste me on your tongue

for you
i will be ambrosia

untitled

(My first of many more Sunday scribblings, I hope.)

to feet and ankles and knees
(when you finally go)
to liver and lungs and kidneys
(it won’t be long before you do)
to joint movements
(i know you’d soon follow)
to sight and sound
  and teeth and smell
to body mind and soul
farewell farewell
i’ve grown old
must bid you all farewell
(and you have all indeed
  fared me well)
when you take leave of me

but for one

but for one
left with nary a mystery hint
      or murder clue
vanished without warning vanished
       clear from view
long gone before i knew

oh you
i can and will never bid adieu
how could you
ah my heart



2nd - 4th February 2007

February 01, 2007

i dream in the night you died

rising from my bed i go to yours
and dig with my bare hands
tearing my nails on bone chips and glass bits
dig and dig until i bleed
six feet down to reach you fetal-curled
in your earthy womb
and with bloody hands
tear you from sleep
i am there when you take your first gasp of air
i listen for the startled cry that follows
i am the midwif who births you
the miner who unearths you
carefully brushing dirt and death from your body
blowing the dust of sleep from your eyes
i show you off to the moon above
parent and priestess
who bathes and baptizes you
clothes you in the airy stole of her light
we hold each other tight as she gives her blessings
to our wedding night
swear eternity to be entwined
share a drink
the rich claret of life
and seal our nuptials with a kiss
then lay back on our wedding bed
eschewing sleep for connubial bliss
then i am yours as you are mine

      to bury when we die
      or birth into a brand new life



31st January - 1st February 2007