Sonnet XIV (With Further Apologies To E. Barrett Browning)

(... and no goddamn thanks at all to my boss.)

If you must irk me, you had better not
Come up with half-assed reasons. Do not say
"I irk you for I'm bored -- always -- all day
In the office, -- for I have not one thought
That falls within logic and reason, not
'Specially in a conventional way" --
For these things in themselves, asshole, may
Be fatal for you, -- and fury, so wrought,
Will not be unwrought. Neither irk me for
Your own fatu'ty and good sense's decry, --
A creature might forget to weep, who bore
Your madness long, and murder you thereby!
Should you irk me another moment more
You will rue your birth for infinity.