And that is why ...

Oh what big eyes you have!

Why, thank you, sweetie –
it’s good of you to notice!
Come here,
I’ll give you a little hint
about doing your eye make-up:
mascara and liner –
you gotta have ’em;
don’t let anybody tell you otherwise.
And remember:
eye-shadow is a god-send.


Oh what big ears you have!

What? You can see my ears?
And to think I’ve spent the
entire morning doing my hair –
what are you gawking at?
Go on, go play outside;
I don’t want you disturbing me
while I re-do my hair.
Go on;
go play outside, girlie.


Oh what a big mouth you have!

Didn’t I tell you to go away,
you snotty-nosed brat?
What are you still doing here?
Don’t touch anything –
don’t you dare –
now look what you’ve done,
you little monster!
Go away from here,
get moving, now!
Get lost!


Oh what big teeth you have!

You horrible child, you –
go away! Leave me alone,
get lost, scram!
One more peep outta you,
I’m gonna chew off your head
and spit it ten paces away.
Now, beat it,
you monstrous brat,
or I’ll eat you up
and swallow you down whole!

… and stop screaming the
damn house down!


4^th Oct 2004
(major additions & edit 16^th Jan 2005)